Ever get frustrated with how people respond to you, react to you or how they treat you? Well, over time we teach people how to treat us. If we allow someone to intimiate us, discount what we say, interrupt us, ignore us, shut us down, etc. we have allowed that behavior to show up. If someone continues these annoying/frustrating behaviors, we are doing ourselves a huge disservice by not standing up for yourself and decide that "I need to react differently; respond differently; create a boundary around how I need to BE; or set an intention of who I need to BE when we meet or when we have these types of conversations."
I bring this up constantly to indiviudals and teams I work with who are frustrated with how some people speak to them. One type of response that is very effective is starting a sentence with "I feel __________ when you say that. " Keep it simple and to the point and then let them respond. If you don't make them wrong; they don't feel they have to defend themselves and you probably will change the dynamics between the two of you. Try it and see what happens.
It might be helpful to put the words "we teach others how to treat us" on paper and display at your desk; carry with you in your purse or wallet and get in the habit of remembering it and reviewing periodically.
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