Listening and Personalities Differences

I am a fan of DISC personality assessment results although not necessarily the 34 pages of result information you get back -I like it simple and to the point .  As a trained CTI coach, we listen to our clients at various levels. Not just words but emotions, body language, what's not being said, etc. So this whole process is easier for me but is not for most people.  Each of us has a different style of communicating, processing information, temperament, etc. Here are a few clues on what to listen for when  communicating with a particular personality type (DISC)

High Dominant  (results)                High InFluencer (creative ideas)     High Steady (process)
 - next steps                                 - emotions                                       - how to serve others
 - power                                        - what's popular                             - how to please others
 - competency                               - opportunities for fun                      - other's ideas are important first

High Compliance (facts)
 - details
 - logic
 -research

What do you notice about the different styles?  What's important to understand here?  Which of these do you relate to?  Setting intentions before you go into a meeting will be helpful so the boss hears you and you hear him/her.  You may have to set some boundaries on how you will BE when you meet, especially if you are an opposite to the boss' personality. Keep your eyes and ears open to figure out who people are in your circle of influence whether that's work, home, play.  Read some books on personality differences, take a personality assessment and be observant and possibly write down in a journal what you are discovering about this.  Could open up a new world for you where you understand others a bit better, become a better listener and communicator.

Engaging People to Communicate

My passion shows up when I am working with a group of mid-level managers,helping them get better at communicating with each other and learning to be more communicative to the people they supervise. I always start out with a fun, simple exercise "getting to know you" where people share something about themselves. Then it's important to create a safe space.where they feel comfortable enough to talk about what really matters. All voices are important and need to be heard, without judgment.  Talking about the good, the bad and the ugly is very important as when you clear the air of what's really going on, you have the opportunity of moving forward. One way of doing this is asking everyone to share what's each person is good at and what each person could be better at.

Because safety is created and everyone agrees to no judging and no repercussions, typically they will share with honesty. From this, new ways of Being with each other has the possibility of changing behaviors - step by step.  Committing to action and accountability has to occur as well so everyone gets to voice what has to happen going forward and share what they commit to.  When someone requests that others call them on behavior that doesn't serve them is a huge first step to changing behavior. This is easy for some people and very hard for others.  If you can take baby steps to more open dialog, trust and respect will return.

Trust, Respect and Credibility have to be present in leading people. If any one is missing, there will be a negative impact on the team. Trust, Respect and Credibililty shows up more often when communication is clear and transparent and there is a willingness to accept that on one is perfect, mistakes get made but we move on.  Also, never forget the importance of showing appreciation to others - we don't do this enough in our society and it simplly makes people feel really good about themselves.

Managing Change as a Leader

Please check out the attached article I authored and edited by my associate, Becky Walzak. The focus is on the importance of leaders understanding their style of leading through change and understanding how others handle change. We are all very different and we handle change through our own filters. Knowledge is power so the more we understand how people are, the more successful we will become with leading others. This article is published in the Sept. issue of Progress in Lending magazine.

http://www.progressinlending.com/TME913/TME913LeadershipFeature.pdf